We all must cope with change in our lives. We know it will come. Some change can be overwhelming, even frightening. It can also be abrupt, not planned or expected so you can’t prepare. Change can add a lot of stress to your life.

Finding ways to accept and cope with change can make life smoother and less fearsome. It can lessen the stress and enable you to make decisions.

The way we think about change plays a role in how well we deal with it, according to Kendra Cherry in her article “How to Get Better at Coping With Change.”

Throughout my military career, I have had to cope with change, some of it negative. Whether it’s an assignment, a deployment or a promotion, we all must cope with change.

According to Cherry, “Automatic negative thinking patterns can undermine your ability to focus on the positive." She said when negative thoughts bog you down, it is more challenging to have faith in your coping abilities. One way to cope with change, especially negative change, is to change how you view or interpret a situation, according to Dr. Catherine Pipas in her article “Building Community Well-Being Through Emotional Intelligence and Cognitive Reframing.

This is a tool that can help people change their mindset to rid themselves of negative thoughts and look at a situation from a different perspective. It can be a helpful means of turning problems or negative thoughts into opportunities for change and growth.

“The premise of cognitive reframing is that our thoughts about our experiences drive our emotions, actions, and outcomes,” Pipas said. “Negative thoughts lead to negative behaviors; positive and productive thoughts lead to positive and productive behaviors. While we can't change negative experiences in our past and shouldn't deny their impact, we may need to change our thinking about the past if it is limiting our effectiveness in the present.”

It’s all about taking a negative experience and seeing the positive instead. It’s looking at a negative experience and learning from it so you can let it go and move forward.

According to Pipas, it’s easy to get into the mindset that your initial outlook is the only way to look at a problem. Cognitive reframing teaches you to ask yourself questions like, “Is there another way to look at this situation?” or “What are some other possible reasons this could have happened?”

Reframing a situation by pointing out alternatives and reviewing why it makes you uncomfortable can help you see things from another perspective and make it easier to cope with the situation. Using cognitive reframing can help you improve your mental health, reduce stress, build resilience and assist in solving problems. Remember to see change as an opportunity and a learning experience. Look for the positive in any change. It’s a practice that will improve your outlook.

By Chet Curtis, Directorate of Prevention, Resilience and Readiness